“EFT BECAUSE MY PARENTS DIDN’T LOVE ME” (CFS/M.E.)
Do you remember what you felt when you were a little kid? Hopefully, you have sweet memories of loving parents and grandparents.
Maybe you remember your grandmother teaching you how to bake cookies in the winter months, or how she kept a drawer full with your favorite candies ready for your visits to her house. And wasn’t it amazing that this was a magic drawer because it never ran empty!
Unfortunately, some families don’t have the sweet grandmother that loves to spend time with her grandchildren. Their home environment wasn’t sweet at all. One of the most common complaints we hear from clients is an emotion that they have felt all through their lives….they feel heart-broken. They felt that their father or mother didn’t love them as young children. And this lack of parental love has wounded them deeply. It is never easy to accept that you have been rejected by your own parents.
I would like to mention that the pattern of being heart-broken and crushed due to childhood emotional trauma is a big component of CFS/M.E. Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/ Myalgic Encephalomyelitis.
Think about it for a moment, if you suffer CFS/M.E. (or you know someone who does) How do you feel with this illness? Isn’t it true that you feel completely crushed and devastated by it? Now keep in mind that you would have to clear those specific childhood events that crushed you once upon a time, in order to feel better.
The pattern of being heart-broken and crushed is not the only pattern in CFS/M.E. CFS is a very complex illness and each case is unique.
Sometimes, clients say that they cannot remember traumatic events. We can help you find those events and what emotions are behind that trauma and we can help you release it completely from your mind, body and your energy system so you can finally feel good. https://eftmindandbody.com/services
What is important to notice is that some childhood traumas are insidious: they occur to the child every day of their lives. For example:
- The child is neglected every day (His parents don’t give him the love , attention, protection, food, and shelter that he needs)
- Sometimes, he doesn’t receive basic education or medical care
- The parents reject their child
- Child gets isolated or ignored
- Child gets emotionally and verbally abused (sometimes, even beaten)
- Child’s self-esteems suffers by being continually belittled and berated (this can be an every day event, and some children believe this is normal and that everybody lives like that
But since being heart-broken is common during childhood or the teenage years, The following EFT exercise will help those who are not sick with CFS/M.E. as well.
We are including a tapping script and video so you can begin to clear some of this childhood pain.
Note: These videos and tapping scripts are generic in nature and not reflective of an actual EFT session with us. Our sessions are specifically designed for YOU, Your special Needs, Circumstances and Specific Events in Your Life. We help you neutralize the destructive emotions of anger, grief, self-doubt, fear, nervousness, lack of confidence, emotional pain or any other negative emotion, trauma or memory that robs you of your joy. Then you are imprinted with positive beliefs and emotions for permanent change and well-being. If you agree to follow this EFT Round, you are agreeing to take full responsibility for your own well-being. Further, these EFT phrases might trigger your own memories and emotions, write them down and then do EFT focusing on them, until you do not feel an emotional intensity. You deserve peace, so keep tapping.
SETTING THE INTENTION TO HEAL:
Tap 7 to 10 times on your karate chop point (side of hand) or on your favorite point and say:
“I have the intention to learn to stand up for myself with grace and ease. I intend to heal once and for all. I deserve respect.”
When you think about one specific childhood pain, what emotion do you feel? Where do you feel that emotion in your body?
Rate the intensity of your emotion on a scale of 0-10 (SUDS Rating-Subjective Units of Distress)
10 meaning – your highest intensity (I feel terrible)
0 meaning – no intensity at all (I feel happy) * Remember to drink water before and during tapping
While rubbing the sore spot on your chest or tapping the karate chop point of either hand (7-10 times) Repeat the following EFT Phrases aloud:
EFT SET UP PHRASES
Even though I am an adult now and it is shocking for me to recognize that my parents really did not love me when I was a young kid or ever, I deeply love and accept and respect myself anyway
Even though my parents could not love me – at least that was my perception – it seems that I was defective, I really do want to love and accept and respect myself anyway
Even though I felt rejected by my parents all through my life, why could they not take care of me? I could never do anything right in their eyes, I was always screamed at or beaten into submission, I deeply and profoundly love, accept and respect myself anyway
Even though I am really tired of trying to gain their approval, I have decided today that I do not need their approval to live my own life, and it is never too late to change and be happy!
Now tap on the following energy points while repeating your negative reminder phrases: If possible tap on both sides of the face and body. (Use 3 or 4 fingers of one hand to tap on the energy points)
Crown of head: I am releasing the pain I feel because my parents did not love me
Beginning of eyebrow: I was defective in their eyes
Side of eye: I felt rejected by them
Under eye: They could not take care of me!
Under nose: They screamed at me!
Chin: I was beaten into submission
Collarbone: I could never do anything right!
Under arm: I am adult now, and I am still trying to gain their approval
Collarbone: I recognize that for some reason, they don’t want to change and they will never acknowledge that they wounded me emotionally and probably physically too!
Take a slow healing breath in and out and release this emotional pain. Release it from your heart!
How do you feel?
Rate your emotional intensity level on a scale of 0-10, do several rounds until your intensity is down to ZERO.
Now tap REFRAMING AND POSITIVE CHOICES on each of the following energy points:
Crown of head: I am letting go of the pain I feel because my parents did not love me
Beginning of eyebrow: Maybe they could not show me love because nobody taught them how to love their own child
Side of eye: Maybe their own parents couldn’t be loving with them
Under eye: I recognize today that I have always been precious in God’s eyes
Under nose: Somehow, I am here and I managed to survive
Chin: I am releasing all the trauma
Collarbone: Their screaming caused me
Under arm: I am releasing it from my DNA
Crown of head: I am only human and it is O.K. to make mistakes
Beginning of eyebrow: From now on, I choose to feel loved, and welcomed wherever I go
Side of eye: I know that I have always been more than good enough
Under eye: I want to love myself
Under nose: And radiate this love to others
Chin: I don’t need anybody’s approval to be happy
Collarbone: Because I am approving of myself
Under arm: I am giving myself permission to heal in mind and body and in my heart!
Crown of head: I am infusing myself with the healing energy of love!
Take a deep breath in and out and relax your mind and body!
Put your hand on the middle of your chest (your heart center) and tap while repeating aloud:
I am grateful because I know that my heart is healing!
I am grateful because I love myself
I am grateful because I have decided to live my life on my own terms
I am grateful because I am happy!
I am grateful because I have decided to live my life to it’s fullest potential
I am grateful because I know that I have always been more than good enough
I am grateful because God loves me just the way I am
So my questions for you are:
If you suffered childhood neglect, is there a particular event that you would like to heal?
What event made you feel crushed and devastated?
Would you like to replace the pain of your past with joy?
Much love, and take care of yourself,
Edith Howell, EFT Practitioner, Certified by Gary Craig, The Creator of EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques
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